We're Home

Hi all, just wanted to update briefly that we are home and safe! We arrived Sunday evening and have been trying to settle in as much as possible. Brian went back to work Tuesday, but will be taking next week off to finish putting the nursery in order and get loose ends tied up around the house and just help with the family transition.

Here's some odds and ends updates:

• Daniel was doing great taking almost all full bottles before we left St. Louis. They increased his milk intake amount and that combined with all the travel, we think, has caused somewhat of a relapse. He's now finally starting to complete bottles again. The doctors told us we can take the feeding tube out whenever to 'test' if he can manage without, but Brian and I know it's pointless unless he's drinking more bottles by himself on a consistent matter. Please continue to pray that he learns this skill quickly, this in itself is a huge time consumer and is my number one stress causer!
• We have a pediatrician appointment next week, so we have to wait until then to see about weight gain, but Brian and I both agree Daniel's diapers (he's in preemie size) are getting snug, and his onsie this morning was a perfect fit, compared to being baggie a week or so ago. Praying he is gaining lots of weight. Joseph, I have no doubt, is gaining like a champ and continues to eat well and often.
• Nolan is ecstatic to be home and for the most part is well behaved all day. Around dinner his tolerance for sharing our attention runs out and he's very difficult...this isn't really that surprising considering long before babies were in the picture his most difficult time was from dinner to bed...we just weren't so exhausted in the past! :)
• This week Nolan has been going to Vacation Bible School. It's 3 hours in the morning. I brought him the first day (Tues), my first day solo with the kids and by the time I took him, got home with the babies, pumped, fed them, I literally had to get back in the van to pick them up. I had decided it was too much, but we have wonderful friends who have volunteered to take Nolan to and from (thank you Nadia, Drew & Kelly!!!) It's been literally the biggest blessing as I learn the ropes of all of this and get into the swing of things.
• I have pictures I want to upload, but I am lucky to potty and/or eat (usually I have to choose one or the other), so even this update is daring 0n my part. Next week while Bri is home I'll try to update better.
• I knew this would be difficult, but part of me never let myself truly worry about how hard it would be to take care of two babies at the same time because of Daniel's heart condition. I felt I didn't have the right to worry...and worried that worrying would somehow make me seem ungrateful, so I pushed concerns to the back of my head and knew in my heart I would be blessed to have these trials. I still feel like I am blessed to have these trials, but more than once a day I tell God he got the wrong gal for this. I have never known sleep deprivation like this. Last night, thank God, by some strange turn of events I got some decent sleep. I keep reminding myself that this is temporary and then I get really sad because I'm so busy trying to make sure both babies are fed, changed and then pay attention to Nolan that I feel like I'm losing out on just ENJOYING this time. I feel like I hurry hurry hurry all the time. Anyway, speaking of hurrying, I feel guilty even taking time away from all of them. But Brian and I continue to be eternally grateful to the support we have been given in so many ways. Thank you thank you thank you...a thousand thank you's will never be enough, but thank you! And even though I sound tired and like this is all a bit too much, I'm also loving this and thank God daily for this. There are so many amazing moments all day that I wish I had time to share or remember for that matter. For better or for worse, this time too shall pass...